The portable phone chatter problem

Portable phones ought to be banned or restricted, to hear travelers talk about it.

David Speedie, a foundation executive who lives in Upper Montclair, NJ, and commutes to New York, is among those who are fed up with chatty cell phone users. He thinks the latest proposal to create a portable phone car in MetroNorth trains is long overdue.

“It’s about time,” he says. “No one would seriously object to use of a phone in an emergency, or if there is a problem with the bus or train, but I am tired of sitting in close proximity to someone who wants to discuss with spouse what’s for dinner, or to argue with child about doing homework. I don’t expect them to be interested in my personal life, and I have absolutely no interest in theirs.”

Opinions like Speedie’s aren’t uncommon.

Across the country, legislators are mulling new rules that would limit the use of portable phones and, in some circumstances, ban them altogether. The Cleveland suburb of Brooklyn, Ohio, recently restricted cell phone usage to drivers who can maintain two hands on the wheel. The Oregon state senate is considering a ban on hand-held phones while driving. In fact, 21 other states have proposed legislation to regulate car phones since 1995. Bills are pending in 10 states, according to the National Council of State Legislatures.

It’s easy to see why. A recent study in the New England Journal of Medicine, which examined the cellular phone bills of 699 drivers who were involved in crashes, suggested that the risk of collision when using a cell phone was four times higher than when the phone wasn’t being used. (Ironically, 90 percent of cellular phone users rank safety and security — particularly on the road — as the “best reason” to own the device, according to a poll conducted by the Cellular Telecommunication Industry Association.)

So is this backlash against verbose passengers related to the crackdown on car phones? Perhaps. And perhaps not.

As someone who was once broadsided by a trucker who was talking on a cell phone, I think the two issues are dissimilar in several important respects. Obviously, a traveler on a train, bus or aircraft isn’t in control of anything. He or she can drink all the free mimosas the flight attendant serves and still not endanger the aircraft (provided, of course, the plane isn’t airborne). Ditto for travelers on trains and buses.

A driver who is talking on a cell phone isn’t necessarily annoying anyone near them. Endangering them, maybe. But not bothering them.

What these issues have in common is that they both involve portable phones, and in that sense, they’re part of a growing awareness that portable digital devices are part of our present – and future. Now everyone from your state legislature to your railroad company to folks like David Speedie are confronted with the question of what to do about them.

I wish we could consider each case of cellular interference separately, but that’s impossible. We like to bake everything related to portable phones into a single pie and consider the whole messy problem at once. We want quick solutions, like “ban all cellular phones” or “restrict the portables.”

But it’s not so simple.

For example, the case for getting rid of phones in a theater would seem pretty cut-and-dried. How many stories have we read about a phone ringing during a performance, prompting the musicians and actors to scold the audience for its insensitivity? Yeah, get rid of the phones at the music hall. Wait a minute. But what if it’s an emergency? A surgeon or a law enforcement official that needs to be contacted at that very moment. Should they have to surrender their phones at the door? Come on.

When I lived in Europe, which is a couple of years ahead of us when it comes to portable phone use, the backlash against so-called “handis” was in full swing.

At a tennis tournament in Hamburg, Germany, one player refused to continue with a match until a viewer switched a portable phone off. The athlete was, as I recall, less than polite about his request. Newspaper commentators tended to side with the Luddites, but judging from overall cell phone usage statistics in Western Europe, I’d say they were probably on the wrong side of the argument.

Portables aren’t going away. If anything, they’re going to become more popular, and we have to find a way of coping with them. I think getting rid of the phones isn’t the answer. In fact, it’s probably impossible.

Maybe the solution is in agreeing on how we’re going to handle this new technology. Perhaps it’s as simple as agreeing to mind our manners.

In other words, when your phone rings while you’re driving, pull over and answer the call. Don’t use a hand-held phone while you’re speeding down the highway. If you have to make a call from a train, bus, or a public place, keep your voice down. Be brief. Respect the privacy of others and their right to a little peace and quiet. Hey, it’s common sense, but sometimes we have to be reminded of it.

Banning cell phones or partitioning trains by technology “haves” and “have-nots” is a well-meaning but misguided attempt to stop the abuse of portables. Instead of curbing their use, we should try to improve the conduct of their user.

Christopher Elliott is the author of Scammed: How to Save Your Money and Find Better Service in a World of Schemes, Swindles, and Shady Deals. Critics have called it “eye-opening” and “inspiring” — it’ll “grab your attention and won’t let go.” Order your copy now on Amazon, Barnes & Noble or iTunes.

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