Coming home

Before returning to our regularly scheduled programming, here’s one last update on Erysse, Mommy and the rest of the Elliott family.

The two women in our lives came home from the hospital yesterday afternoon after a memorable delivery at Winnie Palmer Hospital for Women & Babies in Orlando.

Memorable … as in dramatic, unforgettable, and quite possibly even record-breaking. Erysse weighed in at 10 pounds and 6 ounces. We still can’t believe it.

Now it’s time to adjust to a new reality: Three kids. Two adults. One cat.

Can you say “chaos”?

So far it’s been somewhat manageable. With the possible exception of this morning, when Iden tried to climb into Erysse’s bassinet and nearly toppled it. Oh, and the time we caught Iden trying to “clean” his sister with a handful of antiseptic wipes.

I wouldn’t call it sibling rivalry … maybe just sibling curiosity.

For the next two weeks — er, make that two months — Kari and I are probably going to be extremely sleep deprived. Erysse engaged in what’s called “cluster” feeding last night. Which is to say she called for room service every 15 minutes or so. No telling when that will end.

So go easy on us, and take anything I say or write with a grain of salt. I’m outnumbered and they’re doing things to me that probably aren’t permitted under the Geneva Convention.

Christopher Elliott is the author of Scammed: How to Save Your Money and Find Better Service in a World of Schemes, Swindles, and Shady Deals. Critics have called it “eye-opening” and “inspiring” — it’ll “grab your attention and won’t let go.” Order your copy now on Amazon, Barnes & Noble or iTunes.

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