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A one-week cruise for just $299 — wait, make that $556

October 20, 2008

Airlines apparently aren’t the only ones incapable of quoting a total fare. Cruise lines can’t give us a straight price, either.

You’ve probably heard about their fuel surcharges and their new steak fees. But have you tried to book a floating vacation recently?

Here’s what happened to Donna Brinkmeyer when she tried to buy a seven-day cruise from Charleston, SC, through Vacationstogo.

I got a quote for $299. It sounded great.

But then, with fees, taxes, fuel surcharges, port fees, and tips it actually came to $556 — an additional 86%.

On some of the cruises the “extras” were more than the cruise itself. To discover this you have to go through God only knows how many screens, and it makes comparing cruise costs very time-consuming.

Do you really need me to tell you that this kind of pricing is a bait-and-switch? Of course not.

The cruise lines will tell you that they’re “victims” of high fuel prices and that they have to quote a low base fare to stay competitive. But where does that end?

How long before a cruise line starts offering zero fares to fill berths — minus fuel, taxes, steak surcharges and port fees?

That’s not a rhetorical question.

Travel agents — and yes, even online travel agents — have a choice. Either they can collude with the cruise lines, luring guests in with a low base fare and then surprising them with an outrageous price increase.

Or they can offer a total fare from the start — one that includes all of the silly “a la carte” items the cruise lines deceptively broke off from their fares.

Christopher Elliott is the author of Scammed: How to Save Your Money and Find Better Service in a World of Schemes, Swindles, and Shady Deals. Critics have called it “eye-opening” and “inspiring” — it’ll “grab your attention and won’t let go.” Order your copy now on Amazon, Barnes & Noble or iTunes.

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16 comments

  • http://www.cruiseresource.com Amber Blecker

    Chris, you’re not far off with the zero fare. A colleague of mine has found that the Norwegian Sky, (NCL) sailing 12/8/08 on a 4-night Bahamas itinerary from Miami has a base fare of only $9/person, with the advertised fare (base plus NCFs) is $109/person. However, once you add all the additional charges – taxes and fuel supplement – the total per person fare is $222.51/person.

    As agents, we’re just as disgusted with this policy. Nothing except that $9 is commissionable to us. While the taxes ($69.51/person) are legitimate, and a pass-through on the actual docking charges NCL is assessed, the $44/person fuel supplement and $100 Non Commissionable Fare (commonly and wrongly called port charges) are just additional revenue for NCL, and make the fare deceptively low.

  • Lianne

    What annoys me is that cruise lines still bill themselves to be “all inclusive.” It seems that you have to really go luxury lines nowadays to get anything that resembles all inclusive nowadays, and you’re definetely going to pay for it.

    I still wonder what’s going to happen to all the “fuel” fees that supposedly got tacked on to both the airline and cruise industry now that oil is under $70.00 a barrel.

  • Chicky

    Oh, the fuel fees will absolutely be rescinded — I mean, they can’t keep charging those prices with oil as low as it is, right? However, I’m equally certain the fuel feels will be replaced with “ocean viewing fees” or “swimming pool maintenance fees” or something else. They’ll keep the money–they’ll just say it’s for something else.

  • http://www.VacationsToGo.com Emerson Hankamer

    I would like to assure you that Vacations To Go is totally opposed to fuel surcharges of any size and to new fees charged before or during the cruise, and we have made our feelings known to every single cruise line. We will continue to voice our opposition and pass along the concerns of our customers.

    Sincerely,

    Emerson Hankamer
    President & COO
    Vacations To Go

  • MoNgo

    “Travel agents — and yes, even online travel agents — have a choice. Either they can collude with the cruise lines, luring guests in with a low base fare and then surprising them with an outrageous price increase.

    Or they can offer a total fare from the start — one that includes all of the silly “a la carte” items the cruise lines deceptively broke off from their fares.”

    Huh? Cruise don’t pay comission on fees and taxes. Do you want insurance in case you need air evacuation or are you sure some drunk won’t knock you off a cliff by accident during an excursion? Your employer may (doubtful for most) cover your medical costs, but you have no coverage beyond Canada and Mexico if you’re on Medicare.
    About that steak dinner and moving TO additional fees for eating at a specialty restaurant. This may become the norm if the demand continues.

    “On October 20th, 2008 at 5:24 pm Emerson Hankamer said I would like to assure you that Vacations To Go is totally opposed to fuel surcharges of any size and to new fees charged before or during the cruise, and we have made our feelings known to every single cruise line. We will continue to voice our opposition and pass along the concerns of our customers. “

  • The Good Doctor

    And the fares seem to be valid for two passengers in the “guaranteed” category, which means you’ll have no say in your cabin selection. And if you’re traveling with a third pax (which could include a toddler), they’ll bump you upwards to a three/four pax cabin where the prices start at $439 per person (plus all the additional charges and fees).

  • Cindy

    Any smart travel agent will quote a bottom line price with everything included as far as taxes and fees go. I am a consumer myself, so I want to know what the end cost is. The old “starting from as little as $—– “is simply an advertising ploy that is used for many items outside the travel industry, nothing new there.

    I do ALSO advise my clients what the gratuities are, the optional cancellation insurance AND the parking fees associated with the cruise. I explain the tipping policy, what is or is not included, ie alcoholic beverages, surcharges on specialty restaurants, even ATM fees on the ship.

    Bottom line is an educated client is a happy client.

  • Joe Farrell

    Lets take it to the ridiculous –

    Cruise Cost Breakdown:

    Management Cost: $20
    Management Bonus: $25
    Travel Agent ‘free cruise’ Bribery: $10
    Travel Writer ‘free cruise’ bribery: $15
    Bed Fee – 7 nights $100
    linen cleaning fee: $2
    Cafeteria Quality Food: $75
    Fuel Fee: – Standard – $60
    Fuel Surcharge: $35
    Special vegetable surcharge: $54
    Steak fee: $10
    Clean Water fee: $22
    Hot water fee: $18
    Cabin vacuum fee: $8
    Boarding ramp charge: $11
    Pre-Departure Picture Fee [ No photo included] $7
    Toilet waste disposal fee: $33
    Dock fees – $100
    Engine rebuild fund: $12
    Cabin rebuild fund: $16
    View Fee [view cabins only] $12
    Fresh Air fee [balcony cabins] $45
    Pool Heating fee: $66
    SPA water heating fee: $21
    Pool Towel fee [1 towel per day per person included] $1 – extra towels $1 each
    Chaise Lounge repair fee: $3 per person per day
    Window cleaning fee: $5
    Brass polish fee: $3
    Entertainment fee: varies per cruise depending on cost of entertainment
    Night lighting fee [protects you from anyone hittng the ship] $4
    Energy Conversion fee [to replace lighting with 'Green' certified lighting onboard: $6
    Tender Access fee [for cruise employees to man the tender stations] $37 per day per tender use
    Security Fee: $27 per person per day
    Cooked Breakfast fee: For any breakfast meal other than pancakes and scrambled eggs: $7
    Sunshine Access Fee: For every day the sun shines on the ship – $7
    Paint Recovery Fee: Those guys you see painting the ship at every stop? Not cheap: $12
    Barnacle Removal Fee: removing barnacles reduces energy costs $8
    Global Warming Fee: [we emit CO2 - so we buy carbon credits, well, YOU buy carbon credits for us] $9
    Port Access Fee: You want to get OFF the ship, right? :$55

    I’m sure there are more . ..

  • Carole

    Interesting stories and comments, but no thanks, I’ll never cruise again. Too expensive and the food is awful. Anyone who claims food on cruise ships, ANY cruise ship, is wonderful must never have dined at a decent restaurant. On my last 7-day cruise I actually lost two pounds. Everything was presented attractively but it all tasted like Holiday Inn fare. Yuck.

    Joe F., you crack me up — you have the greatest comments. Keep ‘em coming.

  • Preston McKinney

    The cruise lines and online travel agencies such as Vacation to Go advertises only the cruise rate and non-commissionable items formerly referred to as Port Charges because Federal Law requires that this two items be items must be included with the price advertised. You will find in the small print that taxes and fees are extra.

    Every professional travel agent that I know including myself always tells the client what the total cost including taxes and fees plus the fuel surcharge. Many people feel that since something is posted on the internet, it must be correct and includes all fees and taxes. They have also been convinced by the big online companies that the individual travel agent is not a professional and that selling travel is simple and any 3rd grader could do it.

  • Steve Steinberg

    I have booked cruises on vacationstogo. com and I have found them to be a fine reputable company. (I dont work for them–just honest feedback…)

  • Feronia

    Thanks alot, Joe F. I’m sure the airlines are going to crash the website, having found out that there were new ideas for fees. ;-)

    I’m still waiting for the day that the emergency oxygen masks will not deploy without inserting a credit card.

  • Cheryl

    Amber Blecker wrote that as a travel agent that only the base fare gets her a commision. So on the tame subject, of an all inclusinve price, but a totally differant situation and I mean really differant! Colleges do the same thing with their evening classes, three is a base price of say $90 and up for each credit, but the fees are equal to or higher than the credit price. I find that just as frustrating!

  • Mindraker

    We travelled on a maiden voyage back in ’92 on the “Black Prince”. Good deal, because of the new boat and “new” crew. However, we were quite pleased. I was just a kid back then, so other than the fact that the rates were “lower” for the maiden voyage, I don’t know all the details about the fees.

  • Andor

    Last night I made two call to the Celebrity Cruiseline agents. The site advertised 5 day cruise for $199.00. But when I tried to book it, it was not available. The agents told me that all cheap cabins were sold. I asked if there would be more, and was FIRMLY told “NO”. So, my daughter and I booked the cruise at $229.00 + tax. This morning, 12 hours later, I saw the same cabins are offered for $209.00. I called the agent right away. He transferred me to the “conflict resolution” person who firmly told me that she would not refund the extra money I paid on their agents solemn assurance that I was getting the best deal. I suggested I call my credit card and cancel the first deal. The agent sneered,”I am sure you will not be permitted to book the cheaper cabin if you do it.”
    The only way I see is to reduce the amount of gratuities by $40.00 per cabin and recoup the money at the crew expense. It doesn’t seem charitable. though.. Any other advise?!

  • MichelleLV

    @Andor. I say instead of taking it out on people who have NO control over what you pay for cruise (because that isn’t right and karma is a b…..), my advise is to cancel your cruise completely if within the window, find a more customer friendly cruise line, or eat A LOT extra on the cruise, and use a lot of clean towels so they spend more money on laundry if it means that much to you. Either way don’t take it out on the people who have no control on what you did agree to pay.

    —on a side note—
    I will never understand the price match guarantee that companies offer…..It seems like a waste of time, and effort for the companies to offer. If someone agrees to a price (even with shoddy sales tactics)..that is the price you agreed to pay for XYZ. If demand is low the price will go down to get more people to buy if the demand goes up the price will go up. It should not be if the price goes down…everyone else’s price should go down also. Don’t buy something unless you are happy with the price it is then.

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